I now feel-- as heretofore messages to you in development express-- terribly 'ambivalent' whenever I have been trying to communicate, to 'break this silence.'

 NHz! For just over a week+, I have not directly messaged you; my guess is-- and it is no good ever for me to so-guess-- that in the usual way of GoodBye you as wombed-one-beloved are plausibly sick and tired of me in my persistence and hope that we may reconcile this-whatever-it-is-that-discomforts-you...But this being-dropped is so coherently like almost all the others from gender-loved-fem: I sense no hope for 'kiss and make-up' no matter my incomprehension of 'what the H did I do to ruin things?'

I now feel-- as heretofore messages to you in development express-- terribly 'ambivalent' whenever I have been trying to communicate, to 'break this silence.' Now guilt-feelings take over thence-- you do NOT answer and my All has to be to cease-and-desist these inputs which common sense might see as intrusion on you. My only response for these questionable-now behavior to 'chat' has to be that WOW I really liked you and it it HARD to give up on what had been DELIGHT!

Maybe IFF I send you a note at Yule-tide, then at your birthday, in a tone nothing but quiet and surrendering, there could be a 'next time' but NO I should not 'bank' on the happy occurence that we could just 'talk'--- ABSOLUTELY THAT WOULD COMPLETELY SATISFY ALL I WOULD NEED FOR PEACE-- MEANING MY PEACE-- AS I AM COMPLETELY UNKNOWING ABOUT WHAT THE SENSED 'DISTURBANCE OF YOUR PEACE' ON YOUR PART REPORTED WAS IN TERMS OF CONTENT-- BUT I RESPECT THAT WEE NOTE OF APRIL 16 THIS YEAR-- AND 

WANT TO AS EVER NOW I REPORT FOR YOU TO GET PEACE

APART FROM ME...

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

νηζ! Fluffy-Flower! Wildflower! I never DID want you to be faithful to me: that is all I have ever told you for an 'expectation' WHEN WILL YOU TELL ME ABOUT LUVs?

Image
? Nancy Fancied by Men! I in Ecstasy and OneUnsolicited Txt IMAGINED Thy Luvs! NHz, perchance soon 2B a Mrs. or Ms to a colorful man, not me please: When you went to Belize March 2-10 I was naught but hopeful that you would multiply, in the works of the late Jimmy Hendrix "be Experienced" [dig-- and likely you got experienced, just please not for the first time ;-)] I have always loved it when my loves "fooled around"-- and maybe you did fool around-- but like my Ex and the Canadian girlfriend of 1968-1971 [Ellen [n`ee] Cail of Winnipeg, Nurse like Thee ;-)]as fooleraround did not tell me about what FUN it must have felt to look down copulating and see BlacknessInOutYou;  I of course have fondly wanted to be TOLD about the fooling so that I can REALLY FEEL You's doing the right thing and forgetting at least for  the time that I happy bliss  ever existed-- your message to this point in funning @Belize was specifically NO MESSAGES!!! OK! THEN TO BE GHOSTED! Goodby...
Read more

I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU

Image
   NANCY! NANCY! I AM TRYING UTMOST FOR YOU TO FEEL AT PEACE, FREE FROM ME, STILL JOYOUS THAT YOU ARE YOU, AND NOW FINDING LOVE WITH (MAN? BLAK-I-HOPE) OTHER THAN ME!!! I LOVE YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH
Read more

Nancy! Meanwhile yes un-erasably I will keep Thee 'top of mind'-- praying I also do not do come too-to-more 'discomfort' to the breach 'stalking' as you may deem it... but I am scared-as-hell about stalking you and will do my utmost to avoid that 'charge.'

 This is so-clearly true: I cannot given my acquaintance of you, bipolar hiker camper, 'wildflower,' rid you from my consciouseness, cannot 'shake' you as the saying goes. Some stubborn elements that for you may be lethally-discomforting-- let's say hope and the sense-maybe-possibility-- keep me thinking of you... In point of fact, I know that from the first moment of this silence/'ghosting' anger has never been how my thoughts of you occur: you stay 'special' and this in all seems best to mean let-you-go the way you have chosen... I think this will not be 'stalking' if I violate especially by over-messaging my orientation toward you... I want you to always be loved... Maybe you are getting love communally at 959 Imperial Point Drive, Ballwin/Manchester MO; that seems OK and utterly plausible. I must have the dead-reckoning that perhaps I as jejeune phone buddy was to you a relation that 'was not going anywhere,' and all-along let...
Read more